Surrogacy can be an emotional journey for some, and surrogates and intended parents alike may experience various fears throughout the process. It's essential to acknowledge and address these concerns to provide adequate support. Here are five common fears and how to best address them.
Attachment and Emotional Bonding:
Some surrogates and IPs might fear the surrogate developing a strong attachment to the baby they're carrying. Although most surrogates develop a caring attachment, experienced surrogates say that it is not maternal attachment. They describe their attachment as that of a babysitter lovingly caring for someone else's child. When their journey concludes, they are met with joy watching the family that they helped create bond and grow.
Health Risks and Pregnancy Complications: Some may worry about the potential health risks associated with pregnancy and childbirth. The risks during a surrogate pregnancy are the same as any other pregnancy. It is important to speak with your doctor to ensure you are healthy to carry another pregnancy and do not have any elevated risk factors based on your pregnancy and health history.
Public Judgment and Stigma: Some may fear facing judgment or stigma from their communities, friends, or family members. They may worry about being misunderstood or negatively judged for their decision. Surrogates generally feel comfortable with this risk so long as they have their key circle of supporters. In addition, some others take this as an opportunity to educate others about how surrogacy is a safe and beautiful family-building option. With vast experience in the field, we here at Collective Surrogacy will support you and encourage you for the entire journey
Legal Concerns and Parental Rights: It is common to question what legal complications could arise from the journey. Surrogates should be assured that this risk is addressed by you and the intended parents having a detailed contract with each other before pregnancy, that both parties are screened and prepared for the journey and receive lots of information about each other before matching, and that both parties are represented by separate legal counsel who is protecting each of their interests throughout the process. Legal disputes are incredibly rare in surrogacy processes, especially when you are being guided by an experienced agency team.
Relationship Strain with between Intended Parents and Surrogate: Concerns about maintaining a healthy relationship with the intended parents and the surrogate throughout the surrogacy journey can be a question new surrogates have. The best way to eliminate this risk is by ensuring your agency is helping you find a great parent match and that you have full discretion to choose a match you feel totally comfortable with and excited about helping. From there, the agency will help ensure you establish an open line of communication and everyone has clear expectations about each step of the journey together. We at CS are also here to facilitate communications as needed and to remove most of the administrative tasks so you and the parents can just focus on your relationship and the pregnancy.
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